Do you have a good relationship with your inner child? Maybe it’s something you haven’t visited in a while (or ever). But healing your inner child by addressing wounded elements is important to work so you can become a better version of yourself.
Lavinia Brown is a practitioner in Inner Child Healing and helps people work their way out of dark, negative places to a lighter, brighter future.
You can learn more about Lavinia and her work here:
Tell me about your professional background.
I am a multi-passionate being with a portfolio career and have had the privilege to live in many different countries (UK, France, India, Hong Kong, Bali, Spain) and do many different things. Mainly in the field of wine (I was included in the Who’s Who of Wine, Asia and have written a book for beginners on the subject – Cracking The Wine Code), marketing, events and since 2015, coaching, speaking, workshops and circles to support mamas to feel less angry, anxious and guilty.
What made you want to get into this field?
My own personal healing journey. Inner child work was the only tool I came across (after decades of searching) that allowed me to start to feel compassion and love for myself. It was such a simple yet hugely effective way of accessing my past, validating my experiences, healing my wounds and learning that I wasn’t irrevocably broken or bad.
What has been your favorite aspect of this work?
Supporting women who are in the same dark place that I was and bringing them to the other side. Here, they are able to be present, they feel calm and confident, and there is room for joy in their life once more.
Can you explain what inner child healing is and what a typical session is like from start to finish?
Inner child healing is giving the energy of our inner child (which we all carry, regardless of our age) the love, validation and attention that she didn’t receive when she was small. By doing this she realizes that she is no longer alone, that she is no longer responsible and that she is safe. When she feels safe, she is no longer driving your car – she calms down and the adult in you is able to step up and take control. And she is no longer projecting the need to be loved or validated onto all those you meet. Life becomes calmer (fewer triggers, less volatility, less reactivity) and you are able to be the mama, partner and woman that you want to be.
I don’t offer one-off sessions but a 3-month programme that includes sessions as well as 24/7 online access to my insights, professional advice and support. Sessions include a grounding practice, checking in with goals, an update on actions set previously and setting new actions to move my clients even closer to their goals. I use a combination of coaching and psychodynamic techniques.
What sort of health challenges can inner child healing be effective for and why?
Addictions, people-pleasing, imposter syndrome, anxiety and panic attacks, depression, anger issues, dissociation, sexual or physical abuse, OCD, being control or neat freak, codependency, perfectionism, catastrophizing, overthinking, presenteeism, procrastination etc.
Is there a technique in your practice that you have found to be the most beneficial to the people you work with?
Inner child work; Inner voice work; Releasing old, unprocessed emotions; Mind/body connection awareness; menstrual tracking.
What is inner child healing like from the patient’s point of view?
A beautiful (and very simple) connection that contains limitless powers to soothe, validate, motivate and reassure.
What would you say to someone skeptical about inner child healing and its effectiveness? How do you approach that?
I have actually never met anyone who has been skeptical about the effectiveness of inner child healing! If you understand both that your belief systems about yourself and the world are created during childhood (inherited from your primary caregivers) and that a ‘perfect parent’ doesn’t exist, then it makes sense that you will have experienced times during which your parents weren’t there for you in the way that you needed them to be. Either through doing ‘bad’ things or not doing enough ‘good’ things such as accepting you and your feelings and your expression of those feelings by validating these and giving you the tools to self-regulate. These are the experiences that lead to self-limiting beliefs which are held unconsciously until we go back to our childhoods and heal them through reparenting our inner child.
Besides inner child healing do you have any universal health and well-being tips that you’d like to share?
Regularly spend time in Nature in order to ground and gain perspective on life, understand your menstrual cycle (it’s your inner GPS and a potent source of power), create at least one ‘listening partnership’ in your life, take cold showers, eat (anything) consciously.
If there was one piece of advice you could give to someone who is struggling, what would it be?
Explore, understand and heal your past. Everything about you and the way in which you think, react and act has its root there.
What resources would you recommend? (books, podcasts, websites that you’ve found helpful)
- Michael A. Singer (Untethered Soul & The Surrender Experiment)
- Eckhart Tolle (A New Earth)
- Bethany Webster (blogs, book and Insta page)
- Bessel Van der Kolk (The Body Keeps The Score)
- Gabor Mate (his talks)
- Russel Brand (Insta page / Youtube channel)
Just like a physical child, your inner child requires love and attention in order to continue to thrive. Regardless of age, we all have an inner child and his or her needs are required to be met.
Learn more about Lavinia and inner child healing here:
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